You should submit your apology to BP. You can submit videos, photos, quotes, whatever you want, as long as you apologize for the thing you did to BP. Did you eat all BP's cheetos? Did you forget to fill up their tank the last time you borrowed their car? Let it all out. Make amends. Say you are sorry.
Rep. Joe Burton is right. BP deserves better than the horrible treatment they've gotten from America. The GOP is ashamed of America, and you should be to. All BP did was try to bring us delicious crude oil with which we could drive our SUVs. They made tremendous sacrifices. And what did they get out of the deal? Just a little profit, which they could now LOSE thanks to mean America holding them accountable. This year they could make over 25% less billions in profits, thanks to America's socialist agenda.
The best America is one that privatizes profits and socializes losses. So Apologize to BP.
Background and logo courtesy of @ImSorryBP. Other things you should read so you can think about what you didJoe Barton Would Like to Apologize
I’m sorry BP for not realizing how much easier you’ve made it to count the Brown Pelicans in the gulf. I mean before they would all, you know, like, fly away, so how could we be sure we weren’t counting the same birds twice? SO much easier now. One dead Pelican, two dead Pelicans …..
Submitted by Kathie
Thanks to TreeHugger for sending us some apologetic souls. I’m glad TreeHugger understands that BP has feelings too. We should warn you that we are not looking for fake, disingenuous apologies, but really, letters from the heart, letting BP know about the things you did to hurt them. Did you leave the iron on? Did you get them fired, accidentally? Let it all out.
If you want to know what NOT to do, click read more to read some examples of gushing raging meanies who really just want to hurt BPs feelings. They thought they could fool me. YOU PEOPLE WILL NOT TRICK ME! I will catch every fake apology and show the world what a jerk you are in the process. Here’s another thread of shameful passive aggressive hogwash. With a bucket of pure unadulterated crazy thrown in (Seriously, one letter is spectacular in how bizarre it is.) Don’t be crude like these tarballs.
Dear BP, I am so sorry I forgot I promised to take you to the airport. I heard my phone ringing, but I was sleeping, and I just NOW found your message. I know you were just getting your life back, and this vacation was SOOO what you needed.
I guess you missed your plane, and I know you’re mad, but when you DO get to the beach, I know you will just so totally relax and forget about all your problems.
I hope you remembered to pack your sunscreen. Because you need a break. So just relax, K?
Submitted by Slept In
Dear BP,
I’m sorry I ever thought that the glimmering sun off of the sparkling blue ocean water was a good way to work on my summer tan. I now know that oil is a much more effective way to get dark.
Thank you for showing me the error of my ways.
Sincerely,
Beach Bunny
I’m sorry everyone is labeling you as the dirty kid, BP. It’s not your fault. Your parents should have taught you better hygiene.
Submitted by Megan
For the Children Dear BP, I think the real sufferers here are the children of BP oil execs. When daddy’s usual 2 mil Christmas bonus goes to cleaning up the Gulf, guess who won’t be getting their second BMW or a beach resort in Maui? That’s right - the children. The poor, underpriviledged children. They are the real victims in all this. I am sorry, BP, for your children. Submitted by Anna
My Useless Degree
I’m sorry, BP, that I wasted my college years majoring in Drama when it is obvious now that you are capable of creating SOOOOO much more. Standing ovation! And keep up the great work!
Submitted by BillBrent
(photo by th.omas)
Robot here…
Hey BP, sorry about knocking the cap off the pipe, I thought that the oil would add some much-needed color to the ocean. What was I thinking…
